Taint feel like X mus dern her.

Merry Christmas everyone!!

Well actually its only Christmas eve here, and only the 23rd there. Snow there, Sun here. However that does not stop there Christmas carols from blasting in the local grocery stores. Nor does it stop there undying need for people to rush out, spend money, and eat. There is something slightly hilarious about wearing flip-flops on a 100 degree day in the middle of the summer in Woolworth's, (the local Market) listening to "Frosty the Snowman," and "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas." It just does not have to same effect. I would say 90 percent of the people here have never seen snow unless they are from New Zealand. I know for a fact no one I have met here have participated in the construction of a snowman. But then again how many of you have seen a kangaroo wearing a Santa hat?

We do miss home though. Especially now. This is the first time we have not spent Christmas with one of our families. Its pretty weird. We are going to an "Orphan Christmas" at the Barclay's house. They have a lot of friends from New Zealand that cannot get home so it should be good fun. Tonight we are going over to another friends house for his annual Eve Bash. I think he has a 30ft inflatable Santa or "Father Christmas" in his front yard. You just cant seem to go far enough to get away from those. Oh well, reminds me of Springtucky. Not a lot of Christmas lights though, and not too many decorations. Religion is not big down here at all. In fact I have only seen a few churches. I did meet some Mormons though... all be it they were "Jack Mormons."

What I think I am going to miss about being home during this time the most is family. Second, Football, and Thirdly, what the new year used to mean to me. As most of you know it meant it was time to kick it up a notch and try to keep up with Oliver for a mile or so longer. It also meant making poor Oly go out it the freezing rain, or snow and play catch with me, long toss and me throwing as hard as I could at him from 60 ft. Listening to him curse as he would get the ball. Then I would ask if he was OK and he would always respond in the same way, "Oh yeah, no worries." I would have to hear from Melissa next time I saw her that his hand was sore because he would never say it. Then Oly would run sprints with me until I was tired. Later I would find out that he had already run 8 miles that morning. I also loved playing catch with Toby and throwing the first ball to him, watch him duck out of the way and yell "Dude you have to warn me if your going to do that freaky shit bro!!" Classic Toby.


It also meant a week or two until Balance Points annual Journey. Most of you know that is the name of good friend Mikey T. and I's musical project. I am mainly just along for the ride, but I am getting better and absolutely love it. We have spent one year at the cabin in Colorado, and two strong at the Ford house on the Oregon coast. This was always a special trip. Months of planning, deciding what to bring, what recording stuff to pack, what to eat, what not to eat, whether or not to bring hiking stuff, rubber boots, and rain jackets, and all the other good stuff. Now the ford house is nothing special to look at. It is located just outside of Waldport, and is a 3 bedroom house right on the beach. Its the deck that really ties the whole house together. A huge window looks directly out onto the ocean. Mike and I set all our recording gear up and do a sort of "Gonzo" recording style, simply hitting record, recording hours of talking, playing, any conversation that comes up. Usually by the end of the 3 days we have filtered through the madness and will leave with a couple songs and some hilarious comments and sayings. Guess we will have to pick up again next year. Shame to break the tradition, but I know it will continue.


Well I hope this finds everyone enjoying, and celebrating life, and the new year. Trust that we are well taken care of here by beautiful people.


Merry Christmas!!!

The Fremantle Doctor

Well the Hornets picked up another win before the break putting us in 6th place, out of eight, finishing 5-7 in the first half. Not bad considering they won only three games last year. We really should be 7-5 instead, but its a work in progress.

Now we have a few weeks, four to be exact, off until our next game. On Sunday the temp pushed 100 degrees. Not excactly the Christmas that we are used to. I am hearing reports of blankets of snow in Eugene and Cortez. So at least ya'll will have a white one.

With the temperatures going way up in the last week or so I am really starting to understand why people say pulling concrete is one of the more physically demanding jobs out there. I recently helped put in a patio and carport on a house in the area. It was a scorcher of a day, somewhere around 36 degrees Celsius which is about 97 f. My day started kinda feeling like I was in the way, and trying to figure out how the concrete was going to get from the drive way to the patio and car port. You see the last time I worked it was on a huge pub. They had a huge crane type machine that would pump the concrete out of a truck and up and over all the construction equipment. From there a man with a remote control, like one for a small car or plane, was directing the tube around the rebar mesh shooting it out of the tube as another man wrestled with the tube working it into the right areas. My job was to walk around in the "mud" holding what looked like a huge weed eater. On the end of it was not a cutting string however, it was a floppy vibrating tube. I would stick the tube in the concrete and fire it up and it would shake it down to an even level. Lets just say I was spoiled on the first day. As my father in law Steve says "all jobs are pretty easy if you have the right tools," and we did that day. And it was a nice 23 degrees.

So back to my second day, hot, 36, and no pump. The truck arrived about 10:00 am after we had set up all the boards and laid mesh, driven in stakes to make sure it is level using a laser level. That's when I found out what my real job for the day would be. Tha Barra, as they call it. Or pushing the wheelbarrow. I also did not know that the other wheelbarrow guy was built for the job. About 5'6", he barely had to tip the handles up and he was off, my first trip I was shocked at how heavy the mud was. I also had to stoop over not able to lift the handles up as the mud would spill out, and the driver of the truck seemed to load my barra up to the brim every time. About two trips in, my heart was racing, and my back and legs were already burning. My shirt was completely soaked and my partner was not slowing down. Then I started on my third trip and I came to a complete stop. The tire had blown. Impossible to move it any further. We had to dump it, then shovel it into a working barra and continue. Another barra was sent for and returned. First trip with this one and the tire popped. So I shared the barra with my buddy Lee. Which was the only way I made it, only having to go every other time. Lee and I talked while it was filled over and over and over. I learned of his chili garden and told him I had once seen a guy eat 2 habeneros for 50 bucks. He laughed and said he had eaten 15 at once for 500. I believed him. He said his whole throat closed up, and it took him a day to recover. He had broken the record of 10 that someone had set at a pub. He seemed happy about it. I told him he was crazy.

Now I tried not to complain to Lee about the barrowing but it was so hot and seemed never ending so I finally said "Man I am not sure I am going to make it through the day..."
He responded "You'll be right mate. Just wait till the doctor gets here."

"The doctor?" I said, "who is the doctor?"

"The Fremantle Doctor." He replied.

Now Fremantle is a town about 75 km south and west of us. So I am sitting here between barrows wondering why and when this doctor was coming. Although I was feeling very much like I needed to be seen. Completely exhausted and not knowing if I could continue, the Doctor finally arrived. He came in cool and sweet. You could see the relief in everyone's faces when he pulled in. See the Fremantle Doctor has no degree, writes no prescriptions and runs no tests. In fact he is not even human. The Fremantle Doctor is the cool sea breeze that reaches the hills at about 1:00 pm. It seriously dropped the temp about 15-20 Degrees in short bursts. It was and is a life saver. And thank god he came when he did. He cooled us all off, chased away the bush flies, and covered us with the smell of the Indian ocean.

We powered through the rest of the day, my mood had gone from grim to good. The owners came home and smiled as they looked over there new patio. It felt good.

The picture above is a French restaraunt here in Mundaring. Its nationally recognized I guess. Someone told us if Liz and I went there to expect to spend 500 dollars. We decided to pass. At night the sign lights up and a trippy green hue is shot over the gum trees. I thought someone would get a kick out of the name of this fancy french eatery.

The other pictures is a little car we saw in Fremantle near the prison. It was Liz's fav color and we thought I would have a hard time driving it. The prison is the first on the west coast. It housed the original criminals sent over from the UK. They built it themselves, and most of the town of Fremantle. Little did england know they were sending there prisoners to an island paridise. So when there sentences were up they sent away for there families rather than go back north. Guess they wanted to live in the towns they built.

Snatch and Trough

Hello again from the Perth Hills. Sorry It has been a bit since the last blog but I have gone from not having a lot to write about, to being to busy, or lazy, to write since. In the mean time a few things have happened. First of all our little bottom of the barrel team beat the league leading undefeated team two weeks ago. It was pretty special. Just one of those good games that you win, not one of the games that I'm getting used to down here where half way through someone pulls out a shotgun and blows there foot off. A game played well by both sides that we just happened to win. That is real baseball. And it felt nice, it felt good to give it to these guys. The team we beat had not been beaten at home in 3 years. I pitched well and hit well also but the real story was the intensity that I saw in the guys eyes on my team. We jumped out to an early lead in the first up 3 nothing and I cruised through the first inning pitching. After that I could just see it in there faces that they wanted it, and they believed they could take it. And we did. Beauty!!

This weekend was a different story. We were up 10-1 after five and I was feeling good about taking 2 in a row. We have not done that yet. But, the fact that we imploded defensively eventually got us. But I think by the end of the season we might turn the corner on that nonsense. And if we do that, we could win the whole thing over here. Why not.

So we snatched a victory from the unbeaten team. And in doing this I did not know that Snatch would be on my mind later in the week. For all those with there mind in the gutter, pull out. And for all those with there mind still in the gutter, stay with me. So Friday I bit the bullet and went to work for the bikey Benno with his concrete boys. Big business, I was picked up at 6 am by a fella named Shawn. He was a very nice guy, younger than me, super tanned, stout, and talked about boxing and fighting the whole way to the job. I had a hard time understanding a lot of what he was saying..it was strange, like my mind wanted to know but just couldn't keep up.

Did you get to see the movie Snatch? Great flick, and Brad Pitt did a great job as a Gypsy. Well, that brings me to my point. I spent 10 hours with 5 guys and barely understood anything they were saying. It was English but it was not my English, nor my translated Aussie English I have picked up here, nor was it Spanglish that I have come accustom too, it was something different.
I am not even sure that I can try to explain in the proper way what it sounded like all day, but Ill give it a try. Here is a sample of a conversation between two guys that were there, Shawn and Toad. It is going to be a little crude. Not my fault but needs to be done the right way.....

"Shackle up ha C**T. Or ya bloody be wettin da crete like ur Mrs!" says Toad

"F-U toad ya queensland C**T, fore I lick your back and take the day off trippen" says shawn.

"Luck wit dat your passin tha 300 mill trough thats filth from tha last,"

" No worries, your drama is not with my trough, its your boots, stay in the mud till your heads right or ill smash ya!!"

"Smash this C**T like ya have before, or your too pissed or bankin on the piss for sarvo!!"

"Sarvo? 5:30 for me C**t!!

Hahahahaha were the last words they pushed out, laughing, no dont quote me on this, its just a piece of about 50 conversations during the day, it probably makes more sense than the ones I actually heard.

After the work was done we went back to the concrete business work shop where the beers came out and they all wanted to give me one and talk. Somewhere in the conversation it came up that I did a good job for a "bloke first off, but full on" and that usually the "blokes were dim as F**k. They mentioned that I was quiet though, and if your reading this and you know me, I am usually not quiet. I responded to them "Seriously most of the day, in fact 90 percent of the time I wanted to talk with you guys, but had no idea what you were saying." " I could not keep up or understand most of it."

Shawn responded, " I thought you were just a rude C**t!!!" har har har har they all laughed.

They were all great guys, the lot of them, and I am looking forward to working with them all again soon.

In the Mean time I thought I would share a few things in the lingo that we have figured out...

Sarvo= this afternoon
bloke=guy
jelly=jello
C**t= (figure that one out yourself)
She'll be right= the hell with it, its fine
No dramas, No worries are both big sayings here
tea= Dinner
Dinner= lunch
Brekky=breakfast
cuppa=coffee
bloody oath= your damn right ( use that alot here)
tha mrs= the wife or girlfriend ( I have not heard anyone say wife)
bottle shop= liquor store
digs= innings
safe hit= hit
suke= wimp or baby

and my favorite, one I think i will use back home for sure is anything "as" I have to explain this one, like if we said, "its hot as hell" they would just say "hot as" but you can use it for anything...

Im tired as, its hot as, im hungry as, your late as, weak as, pretty as, fat as, skinny as, broke as, and so forth, I actually liked it better before I described it in words, oh well...

Finally, I ran our loaner car into our fence, the gate is tight "as" I took it wrong, scratched the side of the car, I was totally stressed because it is Benno's car, and the scratch is huge as. I went up to him the next day and said, " Man, I screwed up, Im going to have to pay you for the scratch on the car, I took it at a bad angle..."

Benno belly laughed and said..."No Stress mate, that's all?" " Those are old cars, you know how many I have?" " I have driven around with no tires before just for kicks." "I know a panel beater, and if you try to give me any money its an insult." " No dramas"


....Good People.....Good Friends to have....

Petro Heads

When we first decided to come down to Australia, I think the last thing I expected was the 1981 Road Warrior mentality to still be running full throttle down under. It is. For some reason every person I talk to or see down here is obsessed with cars, gas, and going real fast. Its like Ricky Bobby and Danica Patrick has some sort of massive reproductive experiment over here. Not that there's anything wrong with that....

The only problem is that everyone assumes that I know about stock cars and drag racing. The conversation has come up several times where people ask me what I drive back home then start hammering down questions about 1/4 mile times, engine size and exhaust manifolds. Not to mention the way (and this is going to make me sound old) the kids drive around here. The streets are caked with skid marks and donuts in all directions. Its not uncommon to see some beater come flying out of the bush, covered in red dust, landing on a paved road, spin a 360 then scurry off into the bush again. The "feral" (as they call them here) creatures driving like this usually have mullets, often dyed black on top and sides and bright blonde on the back.

Two nights ago I was over at the bikey Beno's house looking at the cover of a biker magazine. On the cover was his bike with a girl in a bikini straddling it. Under his bike it read " Beno's bike is pure intimidation." I agreed with the cover. He built it himself in his garage and it was sweet. This was only one of about 4 harley's he has. He is building one right now with a 900 Horse power engine for drag racing. He also uses NO2 and all those bells and whistles. He likes to go fast. Real Fast. As I was leaving he showed me his suped up doom buggy. It was black with a huge skull and crossbones airbrushed on it by his tattoo artists. "oh mate, we are taking this out in December with the shotguns!" "We can just tear through the bush and shoot roo's mate," "no worries, whatever you wanna do, you let me know mate."

Not sure I can see myself riding "shotgun" next to Beno shooting beautiful creatures that I have only seen for the first time 2 months ago, but I was not about to tell him No Thanks either.....

Pitches, Pigs, and Pals

This past Sunday was one of the longest games I have ever played in, and definitely the most I have ever pitched. I threw 16 innings, 202 pitches, and the best news...we won. I am pretty sure that after 4 hours and 16 innings if we would have lost my arm would have fallen off. However, a win always makes your arm feel pretty good. I think I set a record with 27 strikeouts as well, which was just a little icing on the cake. I probably should not have stayed in that long. If you call any baseball coach in the world they will tell you that I should not have, except maybe the team we were playing. Their pitcher threw 206 pitches. Ha! My ego would not let me come out until he did. Anyway it was a well played game by both teams and it showed me my team has a lot of heart.

After the game we went over to Jacinda's house for a BBQ where we hung out with a few Kiwi's (New Zealanders) and I finally met her dad who is the ex SAS-Deep sea diver- Special Op's- Bad Ass. Their house was very cool and had a Shed all done up with a bar, bbq, flags, decorations, and several David Tua (proffesional boxer) memorabilia items on the wall. I looked closer and saw that there were pictures of Mike, Jacinda's dad, with Tua's belts. I asked about these and found out that he was his personal body gaurd for two years. Ha, add that to the list. He walked him into the ring when he fought Lenox Lewis in vegas and lost.

From then I looked over to see a mounted wild pigs hind quarters on the wall with the tail up and facing out. I again asked Mike about it and he got very excited and said I had to go get Liz as it was a tradition for all females that enter the shed. I agreed and drug Liz into the shed where she was forced to open her mouth up the the pig's poop shoot where Mike pulled a lever and a huge shot of vodka ran out. It was priceless and pictures will be coming soon (not our camera) . After that we ate several diffent kinds of meat and huge salads and veggies until my body pleaded for a bed and we drove home. I woke up several times that night hurting in just about every connection point in my body.

Two days later Liz had a full day at work because of a major horse race here called the Melbourne Cup. This is like the super bowl back home. Everything stops, work is called off (unless you work at a pub), and the nation tunes in to see if there bets pay off. I was invited by the Kiwi's from sunday night to go watch horse racing in Perth and having never gone I was into it. It was a site to see. 35000 People. All of them Dressed in the suits, dresses and of course giant hats. It was the Kentucky Derby with an accent. Turned out to be a pretty fun day. The day ended with Mike driving me home in his bright yellow Rolls Royce. Pretty sweet ride. We stopped and had burgers at Alfredo's with his wife Deb. Picked one up for Liz and continued up Great Eastern Hwy into the hills. There was something classic about rolling in a Rolls with two huge brass balls hanging from the back, listening to Mike in his bright white suit, see threw shirt, fully tattooed, cowboy hat, telling me about his times working with the Delta Force from the states. Nice tuesday.

Roadies

Monday morning a couple of the guys, president Ron VB and Don M. Stopped by as they have been recently to "try our cappuccino machine" that someone loaned us. We hash out the previous game and it gives them an excuse to take a half hour off from there work as Air Conditioning installers. While there were here they asked if I wanted to come to work with them on Tuesday to get some extra cash. I said yes and they said they would pick me up at 715.

I woke up early slapped on 30+ spf and covered myself with bug spray. The flies are ridiculous right now and they seem to want to crawl into your head. There is a dance here called the fly dance that you can see people doing randomly along the street, or on the field. There is no need for music for this dance. Its interpretive.

The boys were only 20 minutes late so that was not bad. I have yet to have someone be on time, and the word ish is thrown around alot when discussing meeting times. I piled into there cramped work van. 3 of us sitting in the front seat, phonebooks, papers, duct tape galore, empty beer bottles, water containers, at least 50 cigarrettes, and all the tools, duct, and equipment you could think of were jammed into the van. Ron told me that Jaime, his son, used to sleep in the duct as they were driving around to the various jobs. Anyways, we first stopped at a Croation AC supplier named Izzy. He donated the swamp cooler for our house so I was eager to thank him. His accent was thick and he smiled constantly showing off a huge gap between his teeth. He loved Ron and Don and invited us in for coffee. We sat had coffee and ate cookies with him for about 30 minutes. Izzy spent most of the time trying to get Ron and Don to quit smoking.

We got what we needed and left. Ron and Don talked about how rich Izzy was and that he was addicted to working. We pulled up to the first job and were greeted by a short old man chain smoking and looking at us while we talked to him. He didnt say one word, then his daughter appeared and told us he did not speak english. He also was Croation. We were invited to drink coffee with him as well. He told us through his daughter that the work would be there still after coffee. It was super strong coffee with thick black mud at the bottom of the cup. We learned that they moved to Australia during the war, when his daughter was 4. We asked her if she remembered Croatia, and she said she only remembers images of the war. Like snapshots in here head. They go back and visit often though. After coffee I was thinkin that this was a great job as we had been at if for a couple hours and had not done anything. Then we got started and went up to the roof where Ron and Don walked around with ease while I was scared to death and informed them they did not have to pay me but I would not be gettin on the roof anymore. They just laughed and said that was the plan anyways, for me to hand stuff up and tape the duct on the ground. 4 Hours later the Croations were enjoying cool air in there home.

On the way to the next job it came up that Jacinda (the girl pitcher on me team) was going to try to get her dad to play this weekend. But he could not make it, when I asked why Ron and Don laughed and said, "we havent told you about him?" I said no and they informed me that he was bigger than me and Ripped like a body builder. He was a Kiwi from New Zealand, and ex SAS wich is like Navy Seal mixed with Army Ranger. Apparently he gets jobs once in a while that other people dont want to do. As was the case this weekend. He was called and asked if he would mind delivering a ransom. 20 Million Dollars. To some Thai Pirates. That had hijacked a australia ship in unprotected waters. I am not making this up. Ron and Don then informed me that he does stuff like this all the time. "hes an adrenaline junkie mate." "he cant sit still." That night at training I asked Jacinda if her dad made it back, "yeah, he came in this morning," she replied like it was no big deal. Crazy.

Then our last job was a Middle Eastern man. "oh looks like this guy is a Musy" don said. While the guys were on the roof I asked him where he was from, "heh, Iraq..." and gave me a glass of water. He was a very nice guy, but Ron and Don told me not to drink the water because he had heard my accent. "Dont tell him where your from mate and dont let him hear your accent.." too late I said and they laughed. We went into the house to install the vents and I heard a baby in one room. We went in and it was a toddler, disfigured, on a breathing machine, and completely flat head like he had been laying down his whole life. It was awful. Ron asked the Iraqi what happened. He said, "since he was bond." I was terrified. It sounded like he said he was bombed. And Ron thought the same thing. Then he said again "always like that since he was barn" I breathed with relief when I realized he had meant born, and we finished. They gave us a Pepsi and cookies and we were on our way.

On the way home Ron stopped at the "Bottle Shop" and bought a six pack of beer. These guys worked there asses off and it seemed this was a ritual. "Roadies Mate!" "Best Part of the workday!"

This explained why they usually smell like brew when they get to training. HA!

Interesting first day.

Monkey off my back

Hornets Win!!!

Yes we did only split the double header we had this weekend but we did get our first victory, and it was sweet. A hot 34 degrees c which works out to about 93 degrees AMERICAN. I had coached a game at 930, played 1st (unsuccessfully hitting) in a game at 1200 and then was scheduled to pitch at 230. Boiling at this point, with a sore arm from last week, I decided to give it a go, and actually felt better as the game went on. Once we established an early lead, I knew I had to stay in the game. A win is a win when we are only playing 20 games. Anyways, the guys actually made plays and hit the ball very well against the opposing pitcher. I had to bunt for a hit cuz I am still sorting that area out!

Liz and I went on a bush walk today around a lake and saw a cool turtle with a very long neck. We had just seen one at the zoo and commented on its long neck so we were surprised to walk up to one on the trail and watch it shuffle off down the path. We have a picture Ill put up soon. Bikey Ben is planning a huge party for a fundraiser on Dec 20th if anyone wants to come...haha!!! Well not much else to report except I am off to work installing ac units tomorrow at 7. That is in exactly 7 hours so I am off to bed. Boring session, sorry but I think I am still Zapped from the 115 pitches yesterday. I can say I had alot more fun pitching in a game that was in tact. There is no fun pitching when you are gettin destroyed, no matter the circumstances. You can only smile and say "Keep your head up!" for so long before you sound like a jackass. 2 more wins and we are an even .500. Yeah Baby!!

Business on top, Party in the rear.... and ps..a dingo ate my baby!!

So, Just to get this out of the way, our team got killed on Sunday when I pitched. 17-0. Ha! Definitely a team sport, and I mean that in the truest form. Not beating my chest as I could have definitely pitched better, but in all aspects, a team has to be a team and we are not one yet. But we will get there. Have faith little ones!


Keep the fires in your hearts stoked for a Hornet Championship!! Ha. Why not?

Besides that Liz and I went to the beach this week, as well as the zoo and it was great. You would not believe the Indian Ocean. It's beautiful, and so is Liz as you can see in this picture. We also got a few pictures of the sun setting a full day ahead of you, wrap your enlightened head around that. Ok my new favorite animals are Kangaroos and Koalas. And orangutans. But the Kangaroos are tame and chillen. There are pictures to explain if it is possible. They were tame in the zoo wandering at will among the humans that had to be trained and pushed into places with maps. We saw a crocadile the size of a stationwagon and played with lemurs and these other little monkey things. First time I have fed a monkey or lemur. They loved liz. Oh by the way liz's magpie attack was legit. Headline news this week an 8 year old girl loses eye to magpie, so let us count our blessings!!

Well I don't want to bore you guys, but anyway, we love hearing from you, those of you that have snuck an email out. So please write. Other than that, I am about to publish Koala Video and pictures, and more, let me know if you cannot see it.

Time will tell if your decisions are what you think they are, but your heart will answer your questions without delay. Please, please, please do not write Ringo Star.

Oh the mullet I promised weeks ago is here. Son of bikey Big Ben, Kye is a tremendous athlete and great kid. He posed for these shots the other day after a T ball camp. He is not too be f*ed With. Seriously. Long Live the Mullet...

Oh just saw the blog and If you click on the Picture you can see the whole thing, ill try to figure out how to do alot of pictures from now on, thanks people.

SWOOP and RUN!!!

I had an interesting experience on my jog this morning. I was going along on this trail that I have been on several times before, enjoying the peace and sounds of nature around me. All of a sudden, a bird swooped down right in front of my face, almost taking my eye out with its beak! Not cool! Next thing I know it swoops me from behind, almost pecking the top of my head (luckily I was wearing a hat). An attack was in progress and there was nothing I could do about it. I tried running faster, but it just kept coming after me! I decided to pick up a branch, when I saw a man and his dog walking my way. I ran up to him and asked him if he knew why this crazy bird was after me. He said it was completely normal 'at the moment' for Magpies to swoop people in protection of their nests. He said not to worry because they shouldn't harm me; this one in particular was just warning me to leave her baby Magpies alone! Good to know!! So went on with my run, much more aware of my surroundings and a bit paranoid the rest of the way. When I was close to home I had a nice little ending to my ordeal. A boy and his dad were walking two tiny, black teacup chihuahuas and they were the cutest things ever!! The whole experience really made me miss my favorite little guy in the world. If only he could have been there to protect me!!!

furry friends & beauty in our backyard

This little guy lives in a bush in our backyard... He comes out quite frequentley, but is a little shy still.
This guys is a bandicoot. He and his friends like to come out when Geof is cooking lamb, shrimp, beef and chicken on the barbie. All the meat is free from our biker friend Ben. Geof named the bandicoots "Meat Suit" and the carry little babies in pouches. They are friendly but skiddish (sp). After we BBQ they bounce around the patio and look in the window.
These are Kangaroo Paws I think. They are all over the place and are amazing. They stay like this all summer and are like nothing I have ever seen.
These parrots are called 28's here. The are very cool and are seen everywhere. They have Cockatoos also that are white and pink. Ill try to get a picture of them. They also have kookaburra's that sound like monkeys. They are said to laugh at humans. The crows sound like Geof doing his baby cry.
THis tree is out back and has red flowers. The picture does not quite do it justice.

Who said anything about going undefeated?

Well, opening weekend has come and gone here in Western Australia. As you all know I am managing 3 teams here in Perth Hills. It was my debut this weekend as a manager, and 1-2 ain't bad as far as I am concerned. The first game was a bunch of older guys, and I started a young 17 year old pitcher who has no experience. It was a delight to watch him start with an asshole so tight it could have turned a lump of coal into a diamond, to a cool smiling pitcher who struck a couple guys out and had a good time. The older guys are funny as hell. Mostly they are talking about drinking when the game is over and what is going to be on the barbie when we are all through. The other team in this game seemed, better suited as athletes and I started to get worried about the Provincial League game already. It was a crisp morning at 930 when we started and my game did not start until 2:00ish. Its so different managing the playing. When I played I just had to make sure I had my glove and cleats on, the right colored belt and 3-5 advil in my stomach. Now I am turning in lineups and making double switches, all while watching these Aussie's run around thinking that I am something special. Its crazy. Anyways the first game was just for kicks, really. No-one really cared to much except me, and we got pounded pretty good. Our young third baseman Bri tackled a guy trying to get to third then dropped the ball. The umpire kept it live so I said yelled "Tag Him!!" and Bri picked up the ball and smacked the older guy on the head with it. Later I asked Bri if his dad was upset because he had to get up early on a Sunday and bring him to the field. "No mate, my dad is in prison, that is my uncle." he replied scratching his homemade Mohawk.

The second game actually seemed like baseball. I put on several hit and runs, bunts and just kept our guys running as the catcher on the other team was packing a pop gun. We beat them handily 14-2. It was fun. I started the only girl on our team. She is kinda a bad ass. She threw 4 innings, struck out 4 or 5, walked one, gave up one run and then went to second base and made 3 put outs. She only threw 39 pitches. I was really impressed. At this point I was starting to feel good about everything. I was feeling like I knew what I was doing, and I felt like we could hang with these guys. Then I started watching the PL league come in for there team. They just looked like ball players. Not that our guys don't, but you cant just tell how guys carry themselves, these guys had been coached and playing for a while.

So our game was underway. There pitcher looked pretty good, and by that I mean he might have been able to play college ball somewhere when he was younger. He struck out the side in the first inning. Then we took the field, I was playing first and I started to feel the vibe of the day. Our pitching was needing help, a lot of help. I started the guy that people said had the most experience. Understand that I had nothing to base anything off of. He would throw a strike then hit a guy, walk a guy, strike a guy out, then throw 3 pitches behind the next guy, then give up a bomb. I felt so bad, I really just wanted to take the ball and pitch. But I can only pitch every other game and I promised I would start the first home game. The rest of the day followed suit. Another pitcher, and a lot more work to do. Our last pitcher got some people out and looked pretty good. I struck out my first at bat and the grounded out to the short stop and took myself out as we were down by about 12 runs at this point. It was not pretty but gives us a lot to work on this week. Ouch.

The good part about playing for so long is that I have seen worse. And it is usually followed by courageous acts. People stepping up and making plays, pitching there little hearts out, and grinding there way through the seemingly impassable tasks ahead. These guys kept there heads up, and never quit. And that was more impressive than any lead the opposition could build.

Heaps of lollies

Well I have been very busy this week pretty much putting in 12-14 hours of baseball and PR work every day. I have been working a camp down where a team called the Perth Heat play. This team is made up of Australian players, most of which are or have played professional baseball in the state's. I was in charge of T-ball players along with the the American that I was in touch with here before I came. I think I was spoiled with the little kids up here in the Perth Hills where I am coaching and forgot how bratty other kids, namely the kids from the city can be. It was fun ,and interesting as most of the coaches and kids consider T-ball to be a different sport than baseball. Some of the T-ball kids were going on 14 years old! Ridiculous if you ask me, but they didn't ask me. I still managed to throw my two cents in to the t-ball director and he agreed.

After the camps I do training with the three teams I am managing, along with overseeing the little league and T-ball teams in the hills. This has left little time to go exploring or take pictures of the wildlife and area but we do promise to get some up as soon as we can. On Sunday I had our team play a scratch match against ourselves. It went pretty well and we had a decent turn out. I can not overstate how different it is from the baseball I am used to. These guys are just out to have fun but are very competitive as well and I am sure they will be even more so when we play another opponent. They spend a lot of time talking trash to each other. They could not believe that we do not do that in the states at the professional level. It gets pretty funny and they gave it to me pretty good when I had my first at bat and struck out. I have been telling them that I have not hit in 10 years but I have been crushing in BP but it will take me a while to get the feel in the box again. I did hit a double and single later in the game and although she did get me out I did put the ball in play off of the girl on my team. I am sure I would have never heard the end of that.

Toward the end of the game I threw 2 innings. There were several people who had come to watch just that so I felt I owed it to them to actual throw like I normally would. I was planning on just grooving fastballs to let the guys hit as a lot of the other pitchers were walking "heaps" of people. I struck out 9 in a row in two innings. For those of you questioning my math, the catcher dropped 4 strikeout pitches and only threw out one at first. Anyways it was fun and all the guys and people watching had a great time heckling and that is what its all about.

We have our first game on Sunday against the University of Western Australia. It was not fun setting rosters and disappointing people, but I made it through, now we just need to win the first one.

Oh yea, last night Liz and I watched two Kangaroos play what looked like Tag or Chase with three ducks on the Baseball field in the twilight. It was something I'll never forget. The Kangaroos were very interested in us. It seemed like they actually came out of the Bush to see what were were all doing. Then they started hopping back and forth. I could barely see something scurrying around on the ground, changing directions and occasional taking flight. I eventually could see it was a duck. I asked my assistant coach Jason about it and he said they love to chase things around like that, but never hurt them. "They are vegetarians mate," he said "Too easy mate."

Picking up the Lingo

So I figured since Australians speak English I would have no problems communicating here. Wow, I was definitely wrong about that one! They use so many different words and phrases and with the accent it can be incredibly difficult to understand. I ended up getting hired at the local Mundaring Pub and have worked 3 shifts so far. I think it is going to be a fun place to work and I have already met some interesting characters. The first night I worked people were ordering 'stubbies' (bottles) and 'middies of mid-strength' (glass of light beer) and not tipping me either!!! It's ok though because the hourly rate is quite nice. Needless to ,I learned a lot that night and seem to be picking it up quickly. They told me I am going to be one of their favorite bar-maids. Geof came to meet me after work and as I was leaving my boss Jo told me to grab my 'squizzy' (free alcoholic beverage) before I left. We ended up staying late and hanging out with the regulars and a group of rowdy rugby players.

Also, I have had some interesting experiences trying to buy groceries here. I went today and spent almost an hour just looking at all of the different products and brands that they have. It was not easy to find peanut butter; they carry only one brand and it's Kraft. They have never even heard of black beans which is something Geof and I usually eat a lot of. Their cheddar cheese looks and tastes nothing like ours and a 6-pack of coke costs ten dollars. Oh yeah, and some of the stores don't keep their eggs cold! That is just to name a few! Luckily, we are going to get free meat the entire time we are here from the local butcher because this guy Ben owns the shop and helps coach little leagues. Ben is a burly guy covered in tattoos and is a member of the Harley gang, the Coffin Cheaters'. He is not someone to be messed with and Geof and I are very happy to call him our friend. I'm sure he will be mentioned often in this blog...
We haven't done too much exploring outside of our own area and surrounding villages but we seem to be pretty busy. I am sure once the weather gets nicer we will try to see more and get some photos up. The wildflowers here are absolutely beautiful and we live right on this trail that goes on for miles. But I am excited to go to the beach and see some more of this country!

Oregon Weather

I think we might have packed the winter weather from Oregon and flown it over with us. Maybe that is why our bags were so overweight. It has been raining here. We have had 3 practices 2 of which were shortened or canceled due to weather. The first was interesting watching all the guys scramble around to impress the coach. Then the requests for me to throw a bullpen started coming in. They also wanted to see me hit, but having not done that really for about 10 years I thought a bullpen would be more fun for them to watch. The president of the teams son was eager to catch the first one. These Aussie's seem to have a toughness about them. Adam is 17 and when I arrived he had been having a pretty shit week. He had just lost his job about 3 days earlier. "I got sacked from me job," he had told me, "and I rolled me car last night also." "Its a total loss."

A lot of these kids here don't go to school past about age 16. They start apprentice work and quit school. He was making 36 dollars an hour attaching beds to trucks. Can't blame them I guess for that being an option. Anyway, Adam threw his gear on and I tossed a couple 4 seams his way on the fiberglass mound they brought out. The rest of the team were behind me watching and I asked him if he was ready to start. The guys behind me laughed thinking that I was going full on with the pitches before. Now I really do not throw that hard in the scheme of things. I mean I don't come anywhere near the velocity of guys I have played with so this had me feeling pretty good. Big fish in a very small pond. Ha! So I let a few go and the 4th pitch snuck up on Adam and he caught it very funny and off to the side. I knew right away it was not good. He took his mask off and his face went white. I ran up and looked at his thumb. It was shaking and so was he. I think I scared him more than hurt him, and his mom drove him down the street to the hospital (free of charge...no need for insurance here...) where the put it in a cast saying it was probably broken. Wow. Not exactly how I wanted to start the season. All his mates just laughed and said things like "No worries, things come in threes and thats his third this week," and "That will teach him to catch it right!" Then another kid Joel threw the gear on and I finished. They all had a good time watching, and I think they will have a good time this season. They only won 3 games last year out of 16. I told them we would win at least 10 this year.

Two days later Adam had cut off his cast and was back on the kangaroo dookie littered oval working into the defensive drills. Tough bastard.

Arriving down under

Well, 30+ hours after leaving Eugene, OR on Wednesday the 17th of September Liz and I arrived in Perth, Australia. We were greeted by about 3 families at the airport. Liz and I walked into the waiting area and saw the families nervously eying us wondering if it was us or not. Later the daughter of the president of the team, Emily, said that they could not recognize us at first because I was not making the funny face that I had on the pictures they had found on the internet of me pitching. Ha! Well all the families were so nice and swept up our huge bags and loaded them into the "boots" of there cars. We later found out they call the hood a bonnet as well.

Riding shotgun on the left side of the car, I listened to Ron (president of the club) nervously talk to Liz and I about the airport, driving, our new house, and mostly about all the guys at the "oval" waiting to meet us. They rushed us there, where they were having a "sausage sizzle" in our honor and were excited for us to see there playing grounds. The grounds were quite different from that of the Iowa cubs, Portland Beavers, Smokies, or Cubs spring training facilities. Its a grass field. That's it. A small patch of dirt cut out where they will place home plate. Soft velcro bases the attach to stakes driven into the ground. White X's painted at the different lengths for T-ball, little league or juniors as they call it, and the full length for the Provincial League, Reserve 1 and 2 teams. I will be handling all 3 of the later, as well as playing on the PL team.

We were welcomed by everyone, including some of the players I will be coaching. I mean this in the best way possible but I think I was getting ahead of myself as for what to expect. Most of the guys Ill be coaching are 18-20 years old. The drinkin age here is 18 so they were all drinkin there "full strength beers" which were corona's. A few were having Jim Beam pre mixed in a can! Hilarious! I asked them all if they were ready to start the season they all smiled and said yes and kicked the concrete around with there shoes, keeping there eyes down. They did start to loosen up though, enough to tell me that they could not hit, and pitching was a problem. Ha! I told them that is why I am here and they all became "keen" to the idea of getting better.

About that time 5-6 Kangaroos came out of the bush to greet us. It was amazing. They seemed fake. They were across the oval eating the grass and fertilizing it. They hopped so easily and gracelfully. I cannot wait to see one from a closer view. We were told that would not be a problem. I was then introduced to the fund raising supervisor of the team. He is about 6'5 300lbs. He is what they call a bikey (biker). His gang is very well known around here. He is very intimidating, and I think that is why he runs the fundraising. He owns a butcher shop, 2 tattoo parlos, a concrete business and a security business. His son Kye has the sweetest Mullet I have ever seen in my life. He is about 9 years old and has hair to the middle of his back and short and spiked on top! Ill send a picture as soon as I can get one without offending BIG BEN his dad.

Needles to say Liz and I are going to have a great time here. We have already experienced so much and I have so much more to tell. But we are off to look for some jobs and a converter to convert some electricity. Hope all is well across the ocean. We have had 2 practices and Ill fill you in on those later. Bye!